Dealing With an Addicted Loved One

Are you having problems about a relative or a close friend who has an addiction problem? This article may help you in dealing with an addicted loved one.

The family is the most basic unit of society, but it is also the most important and significant because it is through families that societies and governments are built upon; strong families which brought together form strong societies, which in turn produce strong nations that are able to withstand any form of trouble or destruction.

But the family’s greatest significance does not simply lie on the nation as a whole, but ultimately in the lives of each and every individual in society. The family is responsible for shaping an individual’s personality, perspective and behavior; in fact, of all the factors that contribute to developing an individual’s mind, will and emotions, the family has the greatest impact.

The family’s role is essential in training an individual to become a productive and beneficial member of the community, but when that person experiences disappointment and persecution, the family is the first one he always turns to because it provides an atmosphere of love and care that no other unit of society can give. This is why in cases of addiction, it isn't the rehabilitation center that has that greatest impact in helping the victim change; it is the family.

Dealing with an addicted loved one is challenging and difficult, but one must realize when someone falls victim to addiction, family is the only one he can turn to. This is especially true in the Philippines, where someone who becomes a victim of addiction is persecuted by the society so much so that he has no one else to go to other than his family.

So if a loved one falls into addiction, how do you deal with them? Here are a few simple keys on how you can deal with a loved one who has fallen victim to addiction:

1. Always Assure the Addiction Victim That You are For Him or Her

As family, the very first thing that you must impress on that loved one who has fallen victim to addiction is that you are, and will always be for him. This doesn’t mean that you are trying to defend his actions, but rather defending the person itself. What he did may be wrong and destructive, but ultimately, you have to realize that turning your back on that addicted loved one will drain all hope for change. It is your support that will encourage him to fight his addiction. It is the trust between you and him that will become his motivation and inspiration.

2. Never Let the Addiction Prevent You From Loving Him or Her

The moment someone falls victim to addiction is the moment when a person needs to experience the most love from his family. As family, we must learn to understand that the only way someone can completely turn away from something as strong as addiction is to experience a tremendous amount of love; a victim of addiction must feel that there is still someone who is willing to share the suffering and help him rise back up. Knowing that there are people who are willing to support him in getting rid of his dependency will push his willingness to undergo rehabilitation.

3. Understand That Addiction is the Problem and Not The Person

Addiction is like a disease, a physical illness – it enters a person and destroys him inside out. When a person is sick, you don’t condemn the person because of the sickness; rather, you condemn the disease because it destroys the person. In the same way, we must learn to look at a person and his addiction separately so that we can have the right perspective in dealing with his addiction issue. As a famous person once said: “Be angry with the sin, not with the person.”

4. Learn To Say No Gently

Addiction places a craving in a person that he can’t control, so we must learn to deny him that craving while assuring the person that we are for him. You can do this by constantly explaining that whatever he is addicted in is destroying his life, and while it may be uncomfortable for a season, in the long run it will benefit him.

Dealing with an addicted loved one takes a lot of love and patience, but as family, you must understand how you are the most important and probably the only person that can help him now.